Thursday, April 30, 2009

NEED HELP!

I know, that probably scared you all -- but I DO need help and I had to get your attention somehow!!!!

Why you ask?? What is wrong!? I'll tell you what is wrong!!! I am going to go postal if I have to live another day like this under these conditions!!! And stupid work will not let me sit at home and wait for the culture to change....so.....

HOW THE HELL DO YOU DISABLE DAYTIME RUNNING LIGHTS?!?!?!

Apparently, (as in many 3rd world countries) the Sudanese are CONVINCED that you will waste gas if you turn your lights on while driving. In fact, they do not turn their lights on until it is pitch black outside (which makes night driving extra fun). I have put in a request for night vision goggles to be delivered so that I can drive safely, but for some reason work is saying that this is not a necessity. DO YOU SEE WHAT I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH!?

Now as I mentioned, the Sudanese are very friendly and helpful - right? Which means that THEY CONSTANTLY HELP ME BY POINTING OUT THAT MY LIGHTS ARE ON.

- They help me by honking and flashing their lights at me as I drive;

- They help me by swerving close to my car so they can point at the lights in the front of the vehicle as they drive;

- They help me by cutting me off in traffic so that they can illustrate to me with handsignals that my lights are on;

- They help me by stepping out into the road in front of my car, doing the "flashing 5 fingers" gesture so that I realize that I have left my lights on;

- The police help me by flashing their lights at me in case I was not aware that they were on; and

- The other diplomats (read, those damn dirty brits ) help me by mocking my inability to disable the damn daytime running lights.

SO WHO KNOWS A MECHANIC...or someone from Toyota of Japan!?!?

This is critical. I'm about to burst out into some serious road rage here!! And apparently, attempting to explain that the lights have nothing to do with gas consumption is not an option (mostly because that would require actually talking to people - and unless I am being forced by work to do so, it ain't going to happen) and I don't actually speak their language.

Although I suppose that one option would be for all the Sudanese to learn English, and then gather in the town square so that I can inform them of this critical information. But that might take too long.

God help me if they found out that I drove around with the AC on....

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PS: GOD BLESS PENNY! I received a box with literally 7 boxes of cake mix in it - DUNCAN HEINZ cake mix!!! (Penny, you may have just saved my sanity. You are a SAINT!)

PPS: nobody tell josh about this.

40 comments:

darsden said...

LOL, girl...isn't there a thingamabob on the steering wheel to the left...says something like lights..turn it to the off position.. ;-)
How sweet of Penny! Maybe that will help out your readers.. WE won't have to hear you be so whiney anymore...hoping anyway!

Michel said...

Oh Darsden: that is probably never going to happen -- and for the record, I am BITCHY, not whiney...let's get our insults straight!!!

Michel said...

ok maybe a little whiney. but it's HOT man...you don't know....

Gaston Studio said...

ROFLMAO, again! Well, maybe not really rolling on the floor (I'd never get up again!) but I'm truly laughing my ass off and it could use a little help in that direction.

So, are you just going to ignore the assistance Darsden offered or, are you going to take a look at the steering column?

Actaully, I'm sure the resolution could be found in your car manual (open the glove box, take out the book that says Toyota Car Manual, open it to the index and look under Daytime Running Lights).

Hooray for Penny! At least you'll be a little sweeter for about 7 days if my calculations are right.

darsden said...

Girl you don't have to tell me it's hot. I carry my own insulation all year long that keeps me boiling all the time!

GS-rotflmfao-7 days worth of cake..HA if that!
she's going to inhale the first one before it's gets icing..watch..LOL

darsden said...

OH just for your records I hate that blog frog>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> over there..he never shows me...
I am taking it personal NoW!

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

I didn't even know they had cars there.

Crystall said...

I tried to turn off my daytime running lights in my minivan a while back and there seems to be no way to disable them. Now that I am typing this...why the hell was I trying to do that? Maybe some secret spy work? I have read the owner's manual and there is no info on it. I am thinking that you may be stuck. Which stinks. Since I am not sure what your car's owner's manual says, maybe there is some room for luck.

Comedy Goddess said...

Are you sure it's about the lights?

Michel said...

Jane: Actually, I think you may have been too generous...I mean - do you count today? Plus, with the weekend - i will have unattended time with no witnesses...I predict it is going to be ugly.

Darsden: did you join the frog? Are you a member? Delete yourself and try again. Although, maybe it was because of when I put a secret code in there that blocks you from coming up??

Remember: hell hath no fury like Michel? ?
SC: I kinda wish they didn't - how cool would I be, driving all around..probably waving from the comfort of my AC'd car -- oh wait. I do that now....

Crystall: Dude, I brought it into the mechanics at the embassy - there is no way to do it (according to them). I need a car engineer!

CG: whaaaa?? ummm....now I'm not!

darsden said...

Sub-ROTFLMFAO good one...

uhmmm yes, I joined the frog...how many frogs does it take... doens't work over at Lilly's either!!!

Why don't you just put some duct tape over the damn light already! They make it in colors now make you can find some to match your toyo

blognut said...

You can't disable the automatic daytime running lights. Accept it and move on.

What you CAN do is hit a few of those helpful Sudanese folks who leap out in front of you and give the five-finger flash. They'll learn.

By the way, are you SURE you're not getting the 1-finger salute rather than the 5-finger flash? Just sayin'?

Mrs. K said...

what are you talking about? maybe they want you to do the other type of 'flashing'....sheesh

♥ Braja said...

Let them eat cake.

Not yours.

amy said...

Ok, we KNOW you need help! ;)

Right, I know, you're not asking for THAT kind of help.

Congrats on the beaucoup cake mix - indulge and enjoy!

I'm no help with the lights. In fact, I just got a zillion dollars in tickets because my registration and inspection are expired...(my husband is SO fired...)

bernthis said...

I have literally nothing to say except I hope you find someone b/c when it comes to cars, I am clueless

Fragrant Liar said...

I have turned off my daylights before by turning them to the OFF position. See there should be (unless your Sudanese mechanic really knew something), a switch or knob or some such thang on the far left dashboard which controls this. I am pretty sure there must be an OFF switch in all of the cars that do this.

darsden said...

if you don't drive at night...pull the fuse out...get your manuel out and see where the fuse box is located count the fuses till you get to the right one and pull that bitch out!

Hit 40 said...

Gosh... I would think that there has to be a way!

You should really post this question exactly as stated to:

http://www.cartalk.com/index.html

They answer car questions for free. Yours is very funny. I bet they would love to answer it.

Hit 40 said...

I also found this link when I googled for you. I figure that you have overdosed on the cake mix. You didn't snort it did YOU??

http://www.toyotanation.com/forum/t82305.html

It had several suggestions on how to cut the lights for similar reasons.

Hit 40 said...

Oh... I have to fight for the computers with my boys. Homework always wins. Damn school!!!

So... it takes a while to post.

Justin said...

Either use your weapon to shoot out the lights, or unplug them from behind the light. Ask Paul, or should I say the Metrosexual guy who calls you fat in public.

Beth said...

I need someone like Penny! Except I guess I can buy my own cake.

Bust those lights out with a hammer. Or have they invented hammers in Sudan yet?

Beth said...

Wait a minute! Justin says you have a weapon. YOU gots a weapon?!

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

What the HELL??! I have never heard of this in my life...Sudan is a very strange strange country.

Gaston Studio said...

Darsden: She doesn't know where the owner's manuel is, remember? Plus I like the duct tape idea, that'll work for sure.

darsden said...

GS-oh thats right...she doesn't know where her chit is...
Michel - how can you NOT have your Car book IN your car...where do you keep it..in the bathroom?

Gaston Studio said...

Maybe her friends Rug and Brush took it the other night.

Hit 40 said...

Gosh... I think we need to get Gaston and Darsden a room!!!!

darsden said...

Hit 40-hey, Hey NOw least we didn't brown nose her LOL...trying to earn those brownie points (for cake) giving Michel all those links to help her out..mmmmhummmm googling for her...perhaps that room is needed for you two! LOL

darsden said...

GS-you hear that BS-Whats you DL- on it..

Susan said...

When people get irritated with my driving, I just smile like an idiot and it pisses them off even more. I think you should put a light bulb in your passenger seat or glove box. Every time they want to tell you your lights are on, wave it at them with a shit eating grin.

darsden said...

Susan-OMG I do the same thing, I smile huge and wave...you can see the steam coming out of their ears...

Yes, Michel is missing in action so I am the entertainment for the evening..

Hey Michel come join us ...LOL

Michel said...

Hit 40 you are my new best friend!

Jane and Darsden: you two are crazy. I'm reporting you to somebody. I'll figure out who later.

Beth: everyone needs a penny. They give you cake!!

Mary: oh it happens everywhere overseas. They also use kleenex for napkins.

Susan: HAHA! That is a good idea!

Justin: Paul? He can't fix stuff! He's too busy reading twilight and vanity fair!

Michel said...

fragrant: if there IS, that would be totally humiliating - and I would (of course) never tell you guys this! (but I will check!))

Bern: I KNOW! I kinda think we should just get a new one when the windshield wiper fluid goes out.

Amy: Dooh! that sucks! I hate it when I can't be on my high horse with my hubby!

Mrs. K: haha. You're probably right.

Blognut: You just reminded me! THEY DO NOT KNOW ABOUT OUR ONE FINGER SALUTE!!! It is VERY unsatisfying to flip someone off and have them smile and wave back at you. I need to figure out how to convey an insult. Thank you. I now have my new marching orders.

Braja: thank god you clarified - because that was CRAZY TALK until then.....

Captain Dumbass said...

How about a couple strips of duct tape? Pull them off when it gets dark.

Hit 40 said...

I am so glad that I came back. What a great LOL!!! And captain dumbass - what a perfect comment from a guy!!!!

darsden... I must go back to comment more on your blog!!!

darsden said...

Captain Dumbass-uhmmmm I already said that...OH, sorry I get your name now... ;-)

jb said...

Michel: Tag, you're it!!

Visit my blog to see what you have to do.

Tagged! - (Un)important ThingsPeace,
JB

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Silly girl, you didn't know? You stand beside the car. Be sure to be within 24 inches of the door handle. Tuck your thumbs inside your armpits. Lift and lower your elbows and say, "cluck, cluck, cluck" while turning three times in a circle clockwise (or maybe the reverse in Sudan)Knock twice on the drivers window and Voila! Problem solved.

Or if that doesn't work, you could just take darsden's suggestion.