Wednesday, April 22, 2009

This Hurt Me Most of All.....

I Thought I Made Myself Perfectly Clear?


I'm not so big on SHARING. I never have been; likely never will be. I tend to enjoy conversations more when they are about me -- and if/when they stray from my selected enjoyable topic, I rapidly lose interest and usually just walk away abruptly. I find this limits my exposure to boring people and topics. (and when I say "boring" people, I mean "other" people) But not YOU boring people, OTHER boring people, totally different from you people.


UNLESS (of course) I have some sort of opinion I feel I need to share with you regarding your topic of conversation. Then I am focused on what you have to say and how I either totally agree with you - and then we will likely become BFFs; or, alternatively, how you are dumb. (Could go either way, frankly.)


Is this so wrong? Can't we all just get along?!

So imagine my horror when I find out that I am being harassed by fellow bloggers whose names I won't mention (Jane, Darsden, Smart Mouth, Beth Fragrant Liar and Hit 40) who have given me these "awards" (no cash involved, which is - as I have mentioned previously, yet nobody seems to take this on board - an OUTRAGE).


Now I'm finding out that there were all kinds of RULES attached to these things. (more than to figure out how to copy paste it into my blog so that I can lord it over Minoy who frequently tries to bogart the blog by posting comments that are not about me and my issues (again, an outrage). Most of them had some kind of narrative about what it meant and why it was special (Frankly, You'd think I would have paid more attention since it allegedly was about me! I guess you just never can tell .... GO FIGURE!)


However, if this was not bad enough, I am now being told that I am supposed to SHARE these things. (I do believe Liz can vouch for me that this task is particularly painful for me.)


THEREFORE, I have elected to do ONE of these things - I will post the pics of the awards and name some people I like to read, harass, and spout my nonsense on their blogs. If you are one of these people, then you can pick whichever award you want (or, all of them). You may also attach whatever significance or meaning you wish to it. (Vodka Mom was very clear that I should not follow rules. She is sort of my Pochahontas of this blogging thing. I'm sure she would never steer me wrong....)


If you do not accept or like awards, I really do not care. That's your dealio. I've done my part for earth day by Sharing. Please do not make me do this again. It goes against my nature. I give, and I give, and I give...



Jane at Gaston Studios - For telling great stories and calling me a bitch (but in a nice way).


Beth at What I should have Said - because she named her dog Poopy. That alone should be given its own award.


Mrs. K - For giving me a recipie for Frosting and instructions how I can tune into important culturally significant television in America. Her selfless act of kindness will be remembered for at least 43 minutes (or, until I end this post).


Amy at the Pregnancy Chronicles - because she told me she had a girl crush on me and even though the name would denote that she is, she doesn't seem to be pregnant!

Jason - at the Jason show - because Jane thinks he is hot and he totally dimes out his neighbors - and that, my friends, makes for good reading!

Clark Kent's Lunchbox - because he's the only other boy follower I have and I didn't want to be discriminatory - and he seems kinda funny...there is that. (With a blog, Jason, Justin and dad - here is your honorable mention!)

Toni at Dee-zigns Jewelry - because I really want her to make me a bracelet and I can only think that sucking up like this will help.


Blognut - because she once accused me of being a boy AND a bitch. That takes balls.


Darsden - because she not only comments on my blog, she comments on the comments. That lady can really judge others...and I back that.


Hit 40 - because she hit 40 yesterday....


Okay, I've grown weary of this linking thing. I should just made you look them all up. God knows I have to every day...but now that Mrs. K showed me TV again, I will likely falter in my quest to be the greatest commenter of all time. (Sorry Beth, you're good! I'll give you that..but you are not ME, and therefore cannot possibly win (when I am the judge). Do you see?)












Yes, I know it is not Tuesday - but it IS in Sudan....


(HA! Made you look it up!!)

32 comments:

darsden said...

rotflmao...otherwise I would get up and kick your butt...

darsden said...

yep never been one to keep to myself

darsden said...

if I have sumpin' to say by, george, betty, bob, girls named michel, vodka mamas of the world...ya all gonna hear it ;-)

darsden said...

look at ya line in' up your award...next ya not even going to pretend to know us anymore.. er..maybe just me...since there doesn't seem to be anybody else around...! do you have papers for those awards?

Bon Don said...

ha! Great post... I shall go look up all these wonderful bloggers!

Bon Don said...

or just a few...whatever :)

Michel said...

Darsden: HA. No papers....I might have jacked them off of someone else's blog. That's just how I roll. I roll strong!

Bon Don: Or, just tell them you did. They won't know! (But they are funny!) And, there is a good chance I would tell on you. They didn't call me a bitch for nothing.

Susan said...

Mrs. K is helpful to have around, no? She helped me get rid of an anonymous troll so I owe her for life!

darsden said...

u been hanging in the darsden too long ..rolling strong...bahhahahaha

Gaston Studio said...

What's with all the award-passing-out today? Has everyone gone insane? Although I do admire the way you just THREW them out there and yelled, "If you want one, grab it and leave me the hell alone!" LMAO

Gaston Studio said...

I called you a bitch? I CALLED you a bitch? I called YOU a bitch? I called you a BITCH? moi?

Gaston Studio said...

And don't think I'm going to tell Toni that you're just sucking up; she doesn't know you like I do!

Gaston Studio said...

I forgive you tho, for saying I tell great stories. LOL

Hit 40 said...

Oh my heavens!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can not stop laughing. My eyes are watering!!

Quit talking to Vodka mom!!! Are you really going to take advice from someone who talks to kindergartens all day???

Try buffalodick! He seems to have some big balls to dish out the smack.

You are missing a couple awards!!!! I shall send them your way!!!

Hit 40 said...

Oh... and how the hell do you get the darn awards on the sidebar??? This hint would bring you extra treats in your box. I am definitely mailing it tomorrow. I'll drag my student teacher with me. He is very dog like and likes to ride in the car with me.

I figure if I post them all on the side bar like you. Then, I will be safe?? Maybe we need to hang a pic of garlic too?

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Yeah, I detest the whole award/linking/giving thing. It's mostly because it takes too much energy for me to remember, let alone do it...Congrats to all!!

blognut said...

Dude, I have been mostly ignoring this very same task - the redistribution of recent awards - and plan to post something very soon. Where 'very soon' means when I am in a better mood and have more than 18 seconds to both read, write, and comment on blogs.

With that said, I am now considering choosing you as the recipient of all awards and attaching all kinds of crazy-ass conditions to them so that you ignore my rules, too. By the way, I am the Queen of Rule-Breaking, so this will not offend me in the least.

Hit 40 said...

Oh... and another thing. All you have nice to say is that I turned 40? And... I don't think that is even nice?

Where are you?? I shall hunt you down?

Hit 40 said...

Furthermore.... I will bring supersperm with me!!!!!

Kathy B! said...

I second what blognut said. Since you clearly appreciate awards as much as I do I will hereby honor you with the pile that I've been sitting upon :)

First visit to your blog and the post couldn't have been more appropriate!

Beth said...

An award?! From you?! Did the earth tilt on it's axis?

Beth said...

Seriously, you deserve some cash. You are funnier than the Kindergarten students. I'm totally saving all the Monopoly money to send your way!

Beth said...

And Poopy's name impressed you? I'm more impressed with Hit 40's "Supersperm." Try calling that one out the back door!

CK Lunchbox said...

Thank you for the award. I always am humbled by these because they come from real people.

...but word of advice, watch out for Debbie, the matron of all things vodka. One she's nuts and two she's nuts.

Congrats to you on receiving your awards and to the rest of all as well.

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Oh look, our little girl is growing up and learning the rules and how to break them.

Fragrant Liar said...

Well, it's about damn time you posted all this bloggylicious linky-poo kissy-face shit. For a minute, I thought you were a-scared. (That's how we say it in Texas.) And now that you've learned how to break all the rules, we'll let you back in the States. With all your papers, natch.

bernthis said...

why is there not one for the most bitter divorcee in the land b/c today I'd have one that one hands down

Dee-Zigns Handcrafted Jewelry said...

This is why I left you a little something on my blog today, because I see how much you love it!
And yes, sucking up works! What kind of bracelet do you want?

Michel said...

Jane: You BITCH...yes, YOU bitch! Yep! that NEVER gets old! it's my new "thing"

Hit 40: Sheesh mon! You can solve equations, but you can't crack the copy paste code?? My God Woman!

Blognut: DUDE! I KNOW! What is up with the rules!? And the TAGS...it's like we got damn homework when I get home from work! We should start some type of cheating ring; and charge people for our services. Because I can cheat like NOBODY's BUSINESS!

Hit 40: I'm lazy. it was almost like alliteration only not with all the same letters. Do you see? It was a literary masterpiece!

Beth: I bet I could totally spend some of that here! I should start sending all the "dingos" (what you end up calling your foreign money when you can't recall if they are dinar, pounds, durams or WHAT!) I collect on my travels so you could wow the kindergarteners. They are still young enough to think that crap is cool.

CK Lunchbox: You raise a few valuable points - however, you forget the most important point - she has VODKA and is therefore, my very best friend (along with my other friends olive and toothpick).

SMB: I KNEW you would be proud!

Fragrant: I don't speak Texan. Natch? Did you just insult me!? Is that Texan for Bitch?? (bc that's okay then)

Bern: I hereby bequeath you every award I currently have and will ever get in the future because you are the most bitterest of them all! That should solve it!

Dee: HA! I KNEW IT! Do you sell that stuff?

minoyw said...

I'm back on Atkin-ish diet (again). BACON IS MEAT CANDY.

minoyw said...

Hey, those stupid awards are blocking my sh*t!

jb said...

You have an amazing blog...thanks to hit40 she sent me here and it was worth the trip. I got an award a few days ago and she thought I'd enjoy this post and yes I did. You're so funny and I really love it. Please feeel free to drop by my humble blog....I think you'll enjoy it.

Huggs
JB