Thursday, April 16, 2009

Tagged....and Not the Good Kind!

The other day I was OUTRAGED to find out that Jane “tagged” me (because clearly, I had no recollection of that, and I don’t have any alcohol here (yet), so OBVIOUSLY she used a date rape drug…but then I was like, how did she get to Sudan AND get internet access so quickly? Why wouldn’t she tell me she was coming? And why didn’t I remember the date? And she seemed like such a nice Grandma-type (drug dealing) lady. )

Then I found out that didn’t mean what I thought it meant. (Again, blogging guide would be helpful people!)

Now because I did not assign this assignment, I refuse to accept any smartassey comments about how you don’t want to do it, how it’s too much work, or how all the good answers are taken. (Mostly because I already tried that with Jane and if it is not gonna work for ME, then it is CERTAINLY not going to work for you!)

8 things I'm looking forward to:
1. MAIL DAY.
2. ALCOHOL DAY
3. TUESDAY (not really, I kinda thought I had a trend going there, but I am now bored with it).
4. Josh getting here so that I can bitch and complain in person because skype doesn’t adequately convey my opinions. However, Josh, you should probably note that I CAN SEE YOU on the video chat, and perhaps you shouldn’t roll your eyes when I “start” as you like to call it.
5. Losing 62 lbs (by Saturday. What? It’s good to have goals).
6. Not getting lost when I decide to take a “shortcut.”
7. My 8th answer so I don’t have to think of stuff anymore.
8. Acquiring enough power to take over the world and then firing those people who’ve got it coming! (you know who you are…)

8 things I did yesterday:
1. Blogged.
2. Argued with Jane over whether I could comment in person or if I had to post it on my blog
3. Apologized to Liz for giving her husband new medical terminology (which subsequently backfired on me! He claims that my leg is all hurtey because my ass is all fatty.)
4. Got lost taking my new shortcut to work.
5. Continued my quest to be the greatest commenter of all time.
6. Ordered dog food for the strays on petfooddirect.com (nobody tell Josh!)
7. Tried to take over the world.
8. Failed at that, felt guilty, worried that my mother would find out, and promptly decided to stop using my powers for evil (again).

8 things I wish I could do:
1. End this damn list!
2. Steal Jane’s lottery winnings or inheritance and use my newfound wealth to take over the world.
3. Quit my job and storm out in a huff.
4.Eat whatever the hell I want and have it not matter.
5. Retire NOW.
6. Become an Arabic Whisperer (so I can know when people are talking about me).
7. Make Jane quit Smoking
8. That one thing they did on Star Trek, remember when they would stand there and then they would end up somewhere else….because Right now, I’d be at COLDSTONE!

8 shows I watch: Jane! I don’t have TV and this is just cruel!!!
1. Law & Order
2. Colbert Report
3. Lifetime Movies (Fav is Fa La La La Lifetime at Christmas!)
5. Dancing with the Stars
6. VH-1 Totally 80s
7. Merecat manor
8. Celebrity Apprentice

8 people I tag: SUCKAHS!
1. Blognut
2. Comedy Goddess
3. Amy
4. Sane without Drugs
5. Movin Down the Road
6. Mrs. K
7. Suburban Correspondent
8. MINOY and/or Liz (you may share your work)

Due date is one week from Today. Show your work (hit 40, I’m watching you!) Do you own work (except where noted above), and No animals may be harmed in the preparation of this posting.

Extra credit will be given to people who actually do it. Any bitches should be forwarded to Jane.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'll get you back. No worries :)

darsden said...

you forgot to list yesterday you thought you had Chocolate Cancer...LOL thank you for retagging me :-) funny

Unknown said...

OMG, Darsden is going to kill both of us for tagging her! Okay, as usual, I was laughing at loud at your lists and COMMENTS!

See, aren't you glad I badgered you into making your comments SEEN instead of sending them via emails (and trying to hide them from your mom)?

p.s. Wait until you see how I get you back for that drug dealing grandma bullshit!

blognut said...

And for this, you shall dearly pay!

Vodka Mom said...

you followed the rules??

I am SO kicking your ass. Have I taught you NOTHING????

Michel said...

Mrs. K: Bring it on. I'll just claim my "internet went down" You can't prove it. None of you can check!!! HA!

Darsden: I just wanted to make sure you completed your assignment. It was for you own good. I'm "Helping" you - it is for your own good.

Jane: I do see now that my accusations of you dealing drugs was not helpful. And I am sorry the DEA ruined your yard. Nobody could have seen that coming. It was UNknowable.

What? They haven't come yet? Oh..yeah...umm...nevermind. WHAAAAA???

Blognut: I already have...I already have. I had to work on my stupid lists all day. Sudanese relations with America is pretty much stalled now. I hope Jane's happy!

Vodka: first I must compliment the name. It makes me happy just to type it.

You are right! I DID follow the rules. I was not even aware. I am truly sorry and it will never happen again.

Hit 40 said...

Oh.. Thanks for the tag and I also have to pass on an award? to 5 other people. What is with this blogland chainmail??? OK... thank you for the tag. I will try my best. I think I'll do the tag sunday and the award to 5 others too. I seriously have a great post for tomorrow that will have you LOL. And... I have an empty bedroom with its own bath. So, if you ever need to - you can do #4 and quit your job. I will not even make you do any math like I do to my boys.

Beth said...

I got stuck on the Merecat Manor part of the list. What the hell?

Smart Mouth Broad said...

I thought maybe I would challenge you as the greatest commenter of all time but I crumbled under the pressure and ...........I got nothin.
Damn.

Michel said...

Hit 40: I KNOW! I didn't know there would be homework and pressure on this thing either. Just do a half-assed job. Its not graded (by anyone but me).

hmmm....what kind of amenities will you be serving? Is there wi-fi available? Can I bring my 5 dogs I have adopted here? Sure, there are a few fleas and ticks, but I'm sure they won't take up much room....

Beth. I know, I was hoping everyone would miss that one. It's my dirty little secret - it is on Animal Planet. I used to tivo it. They made a soap out of video taping animals for study. It's awesome. (I also used to watch Hannah Montana, but don't tell anyone.)

SMB: I KNOW! It is a lotta work trying to be the greatest of all time. I did not realize this at the time. I, too, have given up the right to that to Darsden, Vodka Mom and Blognut. My work was starting to suffer!

Beth said...

So, are you saying I'm not the greatest commenter of all time? I'm crushed.