Some Random Bitches....

Okay, so the stupid internet was down all damn day! Which makes me crazy because I totally had a BUNCH of complaints to lodge against someone - but now it's late and I forget! (Someone should probably send me either ginkoba or a pen and paper....probably both would be better).


So, by now I am sure you want a status update: I am not sick.


I know! I am as shocked as you are.!! Poop ear? Gone. Stink eye? False alarm. Lassa Fever? Not yet. I don't even have any of the gastronomical/intestinal disorders that are so very common here. NOTHING. I'm frankly scared. The waiting is killing me. Just get it over with already!


What I do have, however, is sweat rings in all of my shirts. This morning at 0700 it was 108 degrees. Even the Sudanese are bitching about the heat. Although, to be fair, it is a dry heat - so your sweat ring disappears very quickly, and then you are left with a lovely salt ring (to commemorate your sweat ring).

God I'm disgusting. So sorry America, I'm humiliating you guys every day. My bad..

AND, I think my shoes might be melting, literally! Of course, I didn't use scientifically proven methods such as "measuring" or "looking," but I swear that the sole-part is melting from walking on the hot sand! They feel thinner...less cushy. Therefore, (Josh) I need to buy new shoes.


Anyway, walking around town with my salty sweat rings, lack of makeup and uncombed hair (to be fair, not Sudan's fault...that one is all me! I got sweat rings people! What's the point!?) is not my worst problem. My critical need at this juncture is a PEDICURE. I thought about taking a picture and posting it here for you, but upon further consideration, I realized that a number of you would probably flag my blog for offensive content. (I would have done it too, frankly.) Remember how I was so excited because I actually FOUND a spa...well, they are only open at random hours and apparently you have to be Ethopian to do someone's feet. And, it appears that the Ethiopians are never at work. (WTF Ethiopia?!)

ERGO, I've reached critical mass here. My shoes are all melty and it is going get very ugly very soon if I do not get a pedicure. In fact, I suspect if I were to walk around with open toed shoes, there would be an international incident.

So for the record, diplomacy is officially on hold until I can coerce a damn Ethiopian to come into work to do my toes.