Yeah, ummm....Hi God. Yeah...it's me again. I just wanted to let you know that tonight is new Year's Eve (which, I'm thinking your probably already know because you kinda know a lotta stuff, right??) Well...since you know stuff...you probably know that I cannot be trusted on New Year's Eve. I realize that there have been a number of instances where I had some bright ideas....
Remember how for the last few years Minoy and I would make the resolution to start smoking?? Then we got sick from smoking and our hair stunk so bad that I couldn't even sleep on the floor of the bathroom with my best friends, toilet brush and rug......so then last year we decided we'd start smoking clove cigarettes because those smell good....but then they DON'T actually smell good - so we had to drop that too... So the lesson we learned from that was that Smoking is NOT a good hobby to start on New Year's Eve.
Now, I know that I was all put out there for a bit that nobody ever warned me about the dangers of smoking, if only someone had put up some sort of a sign or warning or something. I don't blame you though God, I blame Society (and by Society, I mean Canada).
ANYWAY, this year, I thought it might be useful if I could potentially head off the impending smoting and/or visit by the Angel of bedspins and vomit, or (worse yet) the angel of Hangovers and Headaches. THIS YEAR, I was wondering if it would be possible to say sorry in advance -- maybe get some credit, if you will....for what I will undoubtedly pull this evening.
Now I know you're probably wondering how on earth I will manage to get into trouble in a dry country....
I found booze God....I found it.
Weren't You the one who told us to "seek and ye shall find"??? Or, was that mapquest? I forget...either way, God...
What I can guarantee is that I WILL be sorry God. (I always am.) What say you, this year let's just skip the whole 01 January 2010 Smoting - cut out the middle man, if you will....I
If you agree God, I totally promise to tell everyone if 2010 is good or bad -- passing on the message so that Other's know...I'm a whole 8 hours ahead (11 ahead of my mommy, you know...that can really be helpful to them...) It's almost like I'm a Saint, right??
Okay, I'll accept simply not praying for death tomorrow morning. Be a lamb, won't you?? Hear my prayer!!
Best Wishes to you in 2010...I'm a BIG FAN of your work....
Sometimes? I'm Judgmental. Also, Seattle!
3 hours ago