Sunday, April 19, 2009

Easter II

Today was a local holiday - I can't recall which one - something like Coptic Easter or Orthodox Easter, one of those (whatever today is, tomorrow is the other). Sudan gets THREE Easters. God likes Sudan better -- OR, God thinks it needs more help so Jesus came back here three times. -- I'm not really sure. I skipped that part of the bible when I was "reading" it. (Let's be honest, I don't read, I am read to....)
Anyway, so today I just kinda tooled around town. Got some pics I will post here. Some of them look like it might even be green and lush - don't let the photos fool you - turn left and you're back in the dirt.








Views of the Nile - not sure which one - maps are hard.







This is what happens to my roof after a sandstorm (or two) if you don't sweep it off. However, in my defense, nobody told me!! Although, I have now made it my quest to see how big a sand dune I can make on my roof - perhaps we could go sand skiing by Mother's Day...






This was also on my roof - I'm not exactly sure WHY, but apparently, somebody blew someone else's house down and they just left it there. (In the gheeettoooooooo...poor little baby child was born in the ghettooooo....IN THE GHETTOOOOOOOO.)






The babies are growing up! (Riley and Snotty.) That plastic bag on the ground there, that's their TOY...apparently, it is the best toy ever! They love that thing....

(And his momma cried.....in the ghettooooo.......)




Had an interesting conversation with the local guards over the puppies. They told me that they named the mother "Raquel" after me....I was like, what? They said, "we named her after you - Raquel." I said, "You mean, Michel, like Mikhail Gorbachev?" He looked offended, and said" NO! Like YOU."


Whatever.


I just love it when people tell me what my name is, and that I am wrong.... Yes, you would know better than I. Normally that doesn't bug me, I literally answer to anything - Michael, Michelle, Miquel, nicorette, bitch, you name it. However, it's about 123 degrees outside. PLUS, didn't THEY get all spun up about some teacher naming a teddy bear Muhammad?


INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT!! (What now, smarty?!)


And finally, because I am a small child, I had to take a picture of the cheese at the Grocery store because it made me giggle! NOT because I'm a racist (because God knows if I try speak in a foreign language, you know all they hear is: "Me thank you cake like now yes, we go")


Not sure if they are saying the cheese is Humgary or if it is from Humgary. Either way, that shit's funny.







I'm considering purchasing the pototo mayonnaise because I think if i put it up on the roof for a bit, it would make some home-botox. Rub a little bit on my forehead and I'm all set for the next round of National Days.



19 comments:

Dedene said...

How cool! How long have you been in Sudan? What an interesting expat life you have. I'm in France, come and visit!

Comedy Goddess said...

Maybe they meant Raquel Welch?

Gorbachev? Really?

Make your own botox. That's funny.

darsden said...

Mikhail you are hilarious...off the chart! 3 Easters...yea girl...you better go sit you ass in church so somebody can read to ya! You don't even know your own babies names...for pete's sakes...speaking of Pete...there was this dude name Peter who lived a long time ago...now go to church to hear the rest of the story..LOL (you could use that pototo mayo for a sealant...for your roof...i also like how they spell there...right up there with us here in mississippi ;-)

darsden said...

oh...chit...I mean Paul...rotflmao..on my way to church..hussup mikhail...

darsden said...

I always get my peter paul and mary mixed up.

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

OMG, you are hilarious. Every paragraph, if I didn't guffaw, I chortled, or at least chuckled.

blognut said...

I want the Humgary Cheese! I totally would've taken a picture of that, too. I freely admit to being immature.

By the way, in your photo, next to the Humgary Cheese is the low-salt cheese. That looks like some scary shit! Don't put that in your mouth, 'k?

Gaston Studio said...

I wanted more choruses of In the Ghetto from you, I was getting into that!

Love your roofscape, think you should enter that pic at Better Homes & Garden.

Now I can't get that damn song out of my head! Thanks Michel, eh, Rachael, Raquel, Mikhail....

Gaston Studio said...

Wow, you've lot new followers. I'm totally going over to check out that Jason guy.

Gaston Studio said...

...I'm back... but he's still a hunk!

Gaston Studio said...

... and I love his style!

Michel said...

Dedene: I arrived here a little less than a month ago. You probably shouldn't have offered that because now I'm going to show up at your door!! (and will likely demand some cheese)

CG: I think I might bottle it - I'll call it PoTOX. You interested?? I need a test subject!?

Darsden: You're only supposed to take a SIP of the wine in church. I'm telling.

Mary: Thank you (had to go back and see if I was actually TRYING to be funny....) we're okay.

Blognut: Trust me, NOTHING low salt ever goes near my mouth (unless I salt it); did you see the White Cheese Sudanese up above? I don't even know what that shit IS, and it's all shaped funny...I suspect it's like head cheese. GAG

Jane: Cause if there's one more thing that she don't need, its another huMgary mouth to feed in the ghettoooooo....IN THE GHETTOOOOOO.

shit! Now I can't stop singing it. In the ghettoooooo..

PS jason is going to get a restraining order! After all the other complaints other people (read, not me) have filed, this might be your third strike....

Fragrant Liar said...

Tear down that cheese, Ms. Gorbachov! Heh, heh. Oh, I kill me. I am singing In the Ghetto now too. In the ghetto-o-o-o-o-o! Sudan is a lot greener than I would have thought, but I guess that's because you're on De Nile, yes? Better get that sand off your roof before it gets heavy enough to cave in.

Hey, I presented you with a very sought-after and coveted award at my blog. You really must come check it out.

Gaston Studio said...

Hey, congrats on the Zombie Chicken award from Fragrant Liar. Way to go girl!
Jane

Smart Mouth Broad said...

So Raquel, is potato mayonaise like potato salad? Those first pictures really look pretty much the same as here in Florida. So you have to sweep the roof? Humgary cheese. LOL I don't think we're paying you enough.

darsden said...

a lil something over my way if you would like it :-)

G. Harrison said...

Michel,

Thanks for your visit to It Strikes Me Funny.

I'm no celebrity nutritionist, but I wouldn't slag a salad (Canadian definition - v. put down), unless it was 'ototo Mayonnaise' as per your photo and had been sitting out in 123 temps for two days.

Pile the bricks around the dune on your roof. Plant some lettuce, tomatoes...

Keep well in Sudan.

GAH

Vodka Mom said...

Nothing like a field trip to Sudan on a cold rainy Monday morning.

:-)

Michel said...

Fragrant: You're the best man! I totally love getting stuff! it ROX!

Jane! Why thank you!

SMB: I don't think you're paying me enough either; however, when you add in all the time I goof off, we're probably even.

Darsden: That's SWEET! AND, even after I called you a drunk, too!

GAH: (Great initials!) I totally SHOULD start a garden on my roof -- I won't, because I'm lazy, but I SHOULD.

Vodka: I think I might trade you a cold rainy monday right about now! It's HOT!