The Downside to "Vacation"

Okay, so remember how I was all excited because I had so much fun on my "vacation" to Port Sudan? Remember that? Remember how I had all these cool fun-tab-ulous pics of exotic things I saw and did?? Remember that?

Well, as it turns out, I was supposed to be WORKING while I was down there...you know, for the Embassy -- representing our country. (I know! I totally forget that's why I'm here sometimes too!!!) I, however, contend that if they wanted me to WORK, they should have:

(a) been more specific in their guidance other than just saying, "We need you to go to Port Sudan next week";

(b) they should have told me that I was supposed to LISTEN to the people when they were blathering on about relations between our countries and that I would be required to write up what they said upon my return; and

(c) they really should not have let me travel with Christina - and perhaps they should have told her the above too...

I submit to you that this whole fiasco could have been avoided!!!! I'm the VICTIM HERE!

Okay, so after today I have learned yet another valuable lesson about travel within Sudan: Don't do it! IT IS NOT WORTH IT.

Why, you ask?? Why am I now going to take active measures to avoid leaving Khartoum in any way, shape or form for any extended period of time??

Because when you are not here to defend yourself with blatant lies about how busy you are and how you couldn't possibly help out on this or that - PEOPLE VOLUNTEER YOU FOR SHIT!

God I hate those people!!

I bet you were not aware that international diplomacy was such a cut-throat business! That colleagues will turn on you at the drop of a hat. That looking out for your fellow man has gone the way of leaded gasoline and littering without fear!!

So while I was out "working," I was signed up to be a "sponsor" for an incoming officer. An officer who will arrive here at some point (I didn't read all the way to the end! I was busy trying to remember what the hell I did in Port Sudan other than learning that "Sharmuta" is Arabic for Whore! I KNOW! How cool is that word!?) - and will work at USAID!

GASP! I know!! A do-gooder!!! Someone who apparently LIKES people and wants to HELP them....WTF!?

We clearly have NOTHING in common!

I have no idea what I am supposed to say to this person - and, I didn't actually pay attention when they briefed me on the rules and regulations and stuff....what you're supposed to bring, do upon arrival, etc. I just figured someone would tell me. Plus, I'm a big (read HUGE) fan of pleading ignorance and apologizing. You'd be amazed how much you can get away with in life utilizing those two key ingredients. Shit! Guaranteed this guy is going to totally hate me within a week. And, you know who is going to suffer because of this travesty of justice, don't you??

The poor Sudanese! (likely because I will give him incorrect information! It's like I always say, If you don't know it...make it up!)

Obviously, I am never leaving Khartoum again!!! (Well, until next month when I go to South Sudan...)