Friday, May 15, 2009

Questions Pop Up....Others Get Answered

I am headed out to Port Sudan today and do not know if I will have internet (which would totally result in a crabby ass post upon my return, fyi. Darsden, you should prepare yourself)...

Now, as some of you (at least 12 of you that I know of) read my last post - I am going to post the answer very quickly -- I also figured out that I forgot to tell someone else to do it. CURSES. I can't be responsible for this many steps. WTF!?

SOO, Let me start by my telling other people to do it -- I will choose new people I haven't tortured yet to do so because I like to share the love and maybe one or two that I tend to torture all the time - I can't decide...(PS if you haven't read their blogs, you should!)

Lakeviewer
Kelly
Reddirt Woman
Jaimie
Deb
Jason
Kristen

If you don't know what the heck I'm talking about then SCREW YOU! - Just kidding - just hit older post - it was yesterday's....

Okay, so for the big reveal.....

They were all partially LIES! hahahahahahahah God I love that story...let me tell it again --

All of them were partially true, but not quite.....

Now, for those of you who didn't see this coming - you need to refer to the title of this blog - I do not believe in telling the whole truth and nothing but the truth - because then the stories are BORING. Do you see??

So here is the scoop:

(1) Oreos - I totally wanted to write Nabisco a very strongly worded letter - and even went so far as to google it - but then I got distracted because when you google double stuf oreos you get like 10K hits - AND there is a HILARIOUS article on it at the Onion and it has a facebook page. You can see how I could have totally lost interest in this....

(2) I DID get kicked out of girl scouts - (as did two others who are clearly going to be very close friends once we bond in our quest to take over the scouts...) however, I didn't worry that I would not get a job because of the incident - I had forgotten the incident until my first USG training course when they make you do an icebreaker and they make you submit one thing about yourself that nobody else knows. (although technically I was totally tempted to write, I have killed 14 people and they are all buried in my backyard and under the stairs...I figured that they might not think it was as funny as I did...WTF!? (a) that shit's funny; and (b) icebreakers are sooo lame....I've always hated those other people in the training class and don't want to have to talk to them. Just teach us shit and shut it!) -- No, I'm not sure why I still have my job, either.

(3) Josh is not 10 years younger than me. He is 11 years younger than me! I told you guys - I'm hip, I'm hot, I'm now, I'm wow.....OR, Josh was drunk and had beer goggles. Depends on which one of us you ask...

So there you have it - Now you know the rest of the story.....

PS I don't have time to answer the comments because the plane leaves in like an hour and I haven't packed....but very quickly, most of you know me all too well. I wonder how you figured out that Iwas too lazy to actually follow through on stuff. And yes, based on the comments - it is not just the Whitehall, Montana girl scouts that kick you out! hahaha

And for the record, Darsden: Look Lady! It's my blog, I'll be bitchy and complainey if I want to. Don't waste your time trying to change me...see my mother for further reference - she has been trying for almost 40 years now - it's not going to change anytime soon!

24 comments:

Bon Don said...

Ahhh Ha!....I don't, it's just felt like it needed a "Ahh Ha" there!

♥ Braja said...

Oh, sure, right, good, ok THANK YOU...first commenter but you didn't send ME any love. Just as well I love you enough to forgive you. Jeeeeeeeezus.....

Dedene said...

Even if you don't read this til you come back... These were hysterical. I enjoy it when you bitch and moan.
I'm married to a man who's 10 years younger, too. I think I was certainly very hot at the time.

Beth said...

I KNEW IT! There was something that rang as truth in each of those posts. You are evil-er than most!

Beth said...

And you may be on to something in regards to marrying a younger man. My man is 14 years older than me. Damnnit! I probably had *daddy* issues. Now I feel like shit.

otin said...

I like bitchy blogs, it is nice to see that I am not the only one with issues about things in general. Damn that Nabisco, illiterate bastards!

Hit 40 said...

I have to hear more on the girl scouts. This troop leader must have been a real bitch without any sense of humor!!!

Gaston Studio said...

I should have known you'd pull something like this!

blognut said...

Ha! All you needed to write today was, "Blognut was dead freakin' right!" That's all you needed to say. I gave you the partial truths in each of those things and called you OUT on the Oreo thing because I KNEW you were too lazy to write that letter. Ha! Bow to my crystal-ball reading, see-through-Michel-in-a-single-moment, talents.

By the way, I totally come here to read your bitchy complainey posts. Don't change a thing!

blognut said...

Where's Darsden? Did she sleep in this morning, or is she out tending her farm on facebook again?

darsden said...

DAmn liten up on dar...LOL dammit Michel using an excuse of not being able to comment HOW rude...woudln't expect anything less of you..LOL HAVE a safe and wonderful trip to the other side of Sudan wherever the hell it is you are going YOU know you will be missed even bitchy people are missed *sometimes* LOL big squeeze {hug}

darsden said...

what did I do to you that you have to be soooo mean to me...all I have is love for you..LoL even I cracked myself up on that one...!

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

I missed reading you yesterday, and I profusely apologize, on bended knee. I will go there promptly, not that it'll make any damn difference in the end...

Smart Mouth Broad said...

You got me. But at least I did know you were too "distracted" to follow thru on the letter. LOL

Fragrant Liar said...

Ah, shit. I miss one day of reading you, and everything goes to hell. I didn't even get a chance to vote. I WOULD have voted for #1, but since I couldn't, I won't.

I just played this game this morning on my blog, so now you have to come over there and guess what I lied about, when you get back. I must say, we are like-minded bitches. Not that I would ever get kicked out of Girlie Scouts. Now, BOY Scouts . . .

And I have you all beat. My last husband . . . was 16 years my junior, same as Demi and Ashton, and we tied the knot before they were even an item. So there. (raspberry)

marathoner81 said...

I knew it...this is why I didn't try to figure it out!

Hit 40 said...

Got a new computer today!!! Back to two!!! So psyched!!

Pastor Sharon said...

Wow. . . too bad I miss one day of reading this blog and missed the opportunity to call it. . . you are one of the funniest bloggers. . . even if you are seriously having a bad day, you make me laugh! Have a safe trip!

Deb said...

okay, have a great trip. no need to exact revenge on you now... there's plenty of time.

Dee-Zigns Handcrafted Jewelry said...

I'm so surprised and also very envious of your younger man! Now I know what my problem is, I need someone young than me who can keep me. Mine is only 5 years old, but acts like 20 years older. I act like I'm at least 15 years younger so where does that leave us? I could be his daughter :). OMG!

Lol about the oreos, still surprised about the GS, no wonder I was never one.

Mrs. K said...

ok elaborate on the oreo comment 'cause I can't find it

Gaston Studio said...

I miss you!!!

Middle Aged Woman said...

"Just teach us shit and shut it!"

Oh my god, I want that tattoed across my forehead.

Hit 40 said...

I popped by to see how you were :-) I hope you had a nice trip.