Thursday, September 24, 2009

Holy Crap!!

I hate to say it, but the Sudanese are OBVIOUSLY smarter than we are!!! I don't know anyone back in the states who have trained their goats to do this:




I shit you not! That was taken on the bridge crossing the Blue Nile into Khartoum! (This is NOT photo-shopped - I don't even know how to do that - I kinda wish I did because I'd put my head on EVERYTHING and claim that I did amazing things like parting the Red Sea 2009-style!)

It's likely goat-abuse, but I think it is more likely Sudan's version of a shock and awe campaign -- because I had 'em both!!! Naturally, I almost killed myself, and likely caused an international incident while I tried to find my stupid camera, and then drive one-handed at approximately 2 mph (which is likely 76 km and hour -but math is hard! we'll obviously never know...) while I tried to focus the stupid thing - and it's a tad bit blurry - however, it's pure photographic GENIUS!

I should also note that I almost killed myself yet again (in a totally separate side of town, away from the first international incident) this afternoon when I was driving home. So you know how I told you guys all about the rainy season, right?? Well...what I have not mentioned previously (because it is frankly too horrific to talk about) is that the rainy season created a ginormous bug migration to Khartoum -- or maybe more bugs hatched -- I don't know, all I know is this place is one big effin' BUG FARM! There are so many mosquitoes (or malaria-mongers, as I like to call them) that the Sudanese government is starting to dust Khartoum with pesticide -- which I'm sure is environmentally safe, as well as safe for me to be misted with the stuff! ANYWAY, my point is - there are a hell of a lotta bugs.


So, I'm driving along, minding my own business, singing Brittney Spears at the top of my lungs when I feel something drop from the top of my head down my shirt!!! Then, I feel it crawling - so I did what any sane, mature person would do - I totally freaked out and start ripping my shirt off to get the monster out of my shirt. What I forgot, as it turns out, was that I was STILL DRIVING. Nobody panic though - I got the bug - and it turned out it was NOT (as I had feared) a scorpion. (It was a tiny little beetle bug. BUT it was hugely SCARY!!)

Anyway, let's just suffice it to say that today, I'm sure there were a few calls to the Sudanese police to report a crazy diplomatic plated vehicle. Therefore, I'm considering requesting a new car ...

I think it's for the best.

23 comments:

darsden said...

OMG you are the Queen of the Nile for that picture.. bowing out.. WOW great capture! How did he do that you must run him down... and ask him please

darsden said...

dang remind me too when you get back to the States I don't want to be driving when you are LMAO

TechnoBabe said...

I would feel the same way and I for one want to applaud your courage in the face of danger and your ability to multi-task behind the wheel. Whew. I think you also deserve an award for the photo, especially for the fortitude in finding the camera and this again while driving.

Melanie's Randomness said...

o.O I'm in shock over the goat thing. I had to show my office cuz that's absolutely ridicolous!! hehehe. Ohhhhhh I hate that feeling when something is crawling. Eek!!

Linda said...

That picture totally rocks, and obviously you do too! Nice job not killing the biker as you focused.

blognut said...

You know that you handled both of these incidents exactly the same way that I would have, right?

You and me, girl.

Same, same, same.

C.B. Jones said...

76mph is, I think, 3 trillion km. The conversion rate loony at best I am fearful of the metric system. It taunts me while I sleep.

lakeviewer said...

Good job getting that picture. Post it on UTube and you've got a hit.

Middle Aged Woman said...

What? No picture of ripping the shirt off?

Suzy said...

I don't which was worse, goat abuse or the bug down the shirt while driving.

Beth said...

I'm so glad you lived! You poor thing.

I think this calls for a meal of Little Debbie cakes. Before the bugs get to them.

A Mom on Spin said...

Goat abuse, I shit you not!

CarrieAnn said...

That is the best picture ever!

Pastor Sharon said...

Holy Goat!!!!!

About the bugs. . . . . I can't believe you didn't just give the keys to the government car to the bug!!!!

that thing could have caused you to wreck!

otin said...

This post really gets my goat! hahaha!

♥ Braja said...

Otin wins again...
Does Margaret from Nanny Goats in Panties know about this?/?? You'd better tell her, stat....

Hit 40 said...

A couple got on the morning Today show because of a silly squirrel that jumped in their photo. Your pic is way better!!! I expect to see you in the morning on the Today show too!!!!

CK Lunchbox said...

My kids wanted that same backpack for school.

CK Lunchbox said...

BTW, that's the funniest thing I've seen all week. You need to send it to FailBlog.org

Goose said...

That goat is one smart cookie. Maybe his feet are tied around the front. That would be sort of cruel though. And the bug thing - totally gross! I would have freaked the F out!!

McGillicutty said...

What do you say to someone like that? Is that a goat on your back or are you just happy to see me??? Hilarious!!!!!

kristine said...

that is a classic photo!!

Susan said...

The goat! I'm so horny now.