Saturday, January 17, 2009

Saturday, 17 January....

The day that 2009 was OFFICIALLY RUINED!!

And I had such high hopes for 2009 too. Obama hasn't even been sworn in as President yet, and after all the hype, I finally realized something.


What the hell was I thinking?! I fear change!!! Everything was just fine when we were pretending everything was fine. Must we change this??

You're probably wondering why I'm in a snit. I had big plans for 17 January...HUGE! As I have mentioned approximately 86 times now, Josh comes home tomorrow morning. So I intended to get up early, clean, do some errands, get my hair trimmed, pedicure -- you know, girl-Spackle... However, I overslept! No biggidy...I'll just clean later.

So I manage to putz around thinking about what I need to do, then head over to the nail salon. (I went to my favorite salon, so I was very excited!! In the summer, Liz and I would shuffle which salon we would go to because we are both sure the ladies are talking about us and how horrid our feet are (they have a point, we gots bad feet)...but we found this perfect one - where the ladies don't even bother to speak to you. They have flat screen TVs, and they play movies whilst you get your toes done. It's perfect!!!)

Its perfect, but it is also busy. I finally sit down in the chair, put my feet in the water and my phone rings. It's work...they've hit rock bottom because they're telling ME I have to come in and help out. CRAP. So I dry my feet off and get up to put my shoes back on. I try to explain to the lady (who doesn't speak English) that I have to go and that I will come back later, but she just seems to be getting angrier and angrier (I can't blame her! I've already put my yucky feet in the water, she's gotta clean that!) So in order to avoid a potential scene, I just make a run for it.

Now I can never go back!!! AND, Now I'm going to have yucky toes in Costa Rica and the locals (and probably Josh) will mock me....because nobody wants to see that shit!! Thanks a lot Jason!!

So, after I finally leave work, I head over to get hair done, and to buy some groceries. Apparently Josh still likes to have food in the house - I hate shopping and tend to buy only things I can eat - which equates to nothing anyone else would ever want.

Question: WHY does the whole damn family have to go to the grocery store?? WHY must mom AND dad go with your three kids in tow? And WHY can't you keep them in the general vicinity of your cart?? For the love of all that is holy...LEASH YOUR KIDS!

A girl who was about 6 (and dressed like she was headed out to go clubbin downtown), was running around with her brother and sister and bumped into my cart. She started to cry. You're such a CRYBABY! However, in my defense, my cart was STOPPED, that kid ran into it. The little biatch started screaming and ran to her mom down the aisle. Then, the smelly pirate ho POINTED AT ME! like this was my fault! THEN, her mom, had the nerve to glare at me!! WTF! I was tempted to take my cart and run them both down right there in the soup aisle.

Would I do time for that do you think?

HOWEVER, now I can't go back to that stupid Harris Teeter because the smelly pirate ho's mom probably had my picture put up on a wanted poster from the security camera footage. BRING IT BITCHES!

So we're not even halfway through the first month of 2009 and I've lost access to both the Grocery store near my house and my favorite nail salon!!! You know I don't like finding new places!!

Anyway, my point is, I just got used to being in my winter-Joshless-rut! Where it didn't matter if my toes were done, my hair was combed, or if I vacuumed up the dog hair tumbleweeds in the corners. WHY MUST THINGS CHANGE?!?!?!

2008 is looking pretty good right now. Remember how great that was?? How I had access to the Harris Teeter right by my I had pretty toes? How I didn't have to go into work on Saturday?? Remember that?

Well. Change is officially here. HAPPY NOW???

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