Sunday, January 4, 2009

Indians and Indians

Okay, so my lovely hubby FINALLY logged on to read the blog -- and then called to tell me: "Anybody can read that shit! Don't use my name!"

Okay Josh! I hear you Josh. You win Josh. I will not mention your name, Josh, in the blog.

Josh is truly a saint because he puts up with me -- and has not left me yet....yet. However, in my defense, there is no way he didn't this one coming!!

So mom and dad are here and we are having an EXCITING time here in Virginia! So far, we've driven home from the airport....And dad is "defraging" the old 'puter. Naturally, I told Josh it was broken, but turns out it just had 2 million stored temporary cookies. Frankly, I'm shocked that I allowed ANY cookies to store unattended! It's simply not my way.

My neice Amanda has indicated that I need to have a Facebook page...but I think that might be pushing my technological limits. Its pretty much touch-n-go every time I plug in my iPod in to recharge and download new songs. It could go any day now and then Josh would have to pay for a new one. Naturally, Liz' 13 year old would push a button and fix it, and then we'd have two iPods, like we now have 2 'puters. Stop being so wasteful Amanda!! SELFISH!

Speaking of Amanda....Manda is my neice and I refuse to say her age because it makes me feel hideously old, which would then make Laurie and Brandy bummed out...and we're just not going to go there. However, Manda is recently engaged to Darren and they are both in Spokane, WA.... Now, here is where it gets interesting:

My family, and therefore, Amanda is part Indian (Casino, Not Slurpee)
Darren is Indian (dot, not feather)


Now before you get all high-horsey offended...I am not racist...I'm just ill-bred. PLUS, I'm part Indian (reservation, not Gandhi), so i have the right to offend my people and clearly the race of people who have the misfortune to want to join our family. Best of luck to you Darren.

Okay, So while I am on the subject of Indians (Arrow, not Ganesh) -- I'm going to run out of those, so will have to give up pretty soon -- While I was driving to work the other day on (rte 7) I noticed that the road is TOTALLY trashed with old plastic bags, somebody's lazy boy chair (what!? You can't use Craig's List people?), and some random cans and bottles (never diet soda, by the way!! I'm just sayin.....wasn't me!)

What we NEED is that Indian to come and stand by the side of the road and cry. Remember that one?? where he looks at the trash and a single tear runs down his face??

However, we're short on Indians (Teepee, not Taj Mahal) here in VA! Minoy is part, but I think people might just mock her or I if we stood by the road and cried. They'd think someone stole our coldstone (because that WOULD be a reason to cry people). What we need is to import an older male Indian (wigwam, not Bollywood)! Mom! Go see what Grandpa is doing. I gots a job for him!!!

Now that I have probably offended many, many people...most of whom are members of my or Minoy's family...I will bid you adieu. However, I will leave you with a topic for discussion:

I saw an Asian Lady Driving a PT Cruiser Last Night!!!

Yes, I know. I am going to hell.....but still! it kinda freaked me out!! I have only ever seen Asian people in Honda's, Toyota's or high end cars like Mercedes, Jags, etc. NEVER a Chrysler or (God forbid) Chrysler or Ford! COMBINED with the fact that PT cruisers really make me angry (not sure why, don't care enough to find out) - it threw me off.

SO! Discuss amongst yourselves!! And while you're doing that! Wish Qorn's wife Barbara a happy birthday!!!


Manda said...

This makes my heart Happy ! Funny thing being that Daron has no real ties to India what so ever , he was raised by a white family in Alaska … He identifies with Eskimos rather than curry lovers- although we have eaten out at the Indian restaurant & he likes SlurpeeS…. Maybe his Indian genes are emerging –But who can turn down a Good Slurpee…? “7-11 IN the Casino" I THINK NOT- our children are going to run the gas station we open on the reservation … thank you very much !

Missy said...

Ohhhh, I laughed so hard...