As you all know (and I recently found out courtesy of someone's blog!) today is Father's Day....so I thought you should all know a little bit about the man I still call "My Daddy."
Now, I realize this may come as a shock to many of you, but I was a TAD possessive as a child and my parents were known as My Daddy and My Mommy respectively. I would frequently inform my sister that these were MY parents and she could go get her own (GEEZ MEL! DOOY!!!)
My father was a PUSHOVER. I knew my mother would insist on proof of illness, so I would wait until mom had to leave for work and then run up to dad and say, "I don't feel so good" and he would immediately ask me what I needed. I would (of course) ask him what was available.....
"No, not that....No...Keep going....maybe, we'll come back to that later. YES! PUDDING! That is EXACTLY what I need for my - what did I say I had again?"
So I pretty much could have whatever I wanted from him. (And really, isn't that what good parenting is all about?? )
I kinda feel bad for my mom now....
However, a few discrepancies have come to light in recent years and now I question his parenting certification!
(a) I asked why gas was more expensive at Grandpa Harold's house than it was at our house; my daddy told me it was because the price of gas was determined by the distance from Kansas City. I believed this until I was circa 30 years old and found out (naturally) at work via public humiliation.
(b) When I got my driver's license I was so excited to drive the car. He told me that I needed to go change the summer air to winter air in the tires. He gave me $20 to do so. I kept that $20 for punitive damages. He probably still owes me $50 for that humiliation.
(c) When I was posted in Peshawar I was driving with a big-wig from Washington in the car showing him the sights and we came upon a line of camels going through town. The guy pointed out a dromedarie, and I was like, "WHAT!? That's a camel!" And then proceeded to spout off about how camels have two humps if they are going on a long journey across the dessert, because that is where they store their water...so you can tell if a camel is going far if it has two humps of water for the journey...."
I trailed off as I saw the look on his face (which was familiar to (a) above's reaction) and I remembered the source of my info - MY DADDY! However, in my defense, WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU LIE ABOUT THAT!? And it's not like camels were going to come up living in Montana!
Now I'm not so sure if he's my daddy or my arch nemesis! However, as you can see from below, he fully accepted his granddog Kernel, therefore, I have to let it go.
To this day, I live in fear that I will find yet another big fat lie he told me as a child. Problem is, even HE doesn't remember all the nonsense he has spouted over the years! At least I now know why he always seemed to be laughing during my younger years. He was plotting his revenge!
Well played My Daddy....well played!
Happy Father's Day!
Sometimes? I'm Judgmental. Also, Seattle!
13 hours ago