Sunday, August 9, 2009

When Comments Go Bad....

No, I didn't say anything -- well, I probably did, but nobody has called me on it (yet). HOWEVER, the other day I received the most retarded comment EVER...and the guy did it with the no-reply button so I am forced to mock him openly in my blog. (I don't make the rules people -- okay, well maybe I do, but EVERYBODY totally knows that any comment made on this blog opens yourself up to public mockery. ESPECIALLY if you obviously did not read the post that you chose to comment on...)

You see, it's what I do...

Okay, so waaay back in the day - when I was bitching and moaning about having to diet and exercise. What? I need to be more specific? Good point. Could be any post.

On my previous post, lovingly entitled Pharmaceutical Bailout, I gave the world yet another BRILLIANT solution to the problem with my fat ass: I suggested that science get on it and instead of just sitting back and allowing Ambien to let you sleepwalk, send emails or bake, science should make it so that the side effect was that you go to the gym while you were asleep!!

SERIOUSLY! How totally cool would that be?! See!?! I'm getting all excited again! It's STILL a great idea. And frankly, its probably the only way that I would go to the gym without bitching about it to somebody.

PLUS (as another added bonus, science), I would also probably stop harassing you guys (and Liz' hubby Dan whom I kinda don't believe is a real doctor anymore because he refuses to diagnose my made up Africa diseases via Skype) as to the status of the "fat pill" that you claim to be working on so diligently - which I also no longer believe you're even trying, because you've managed to find a cure for breast and skin cancer but not this? Fat cells aren't even mutating into shit, they're just expanding (exponentially if you're me).

That's just LAZY science!

Ok, I digress. SO, this is the comment that I received from a helpful reader:

The highly popular sleep medication ambien is used for short term sleep treatment only, i.e. for 7 to 10 days and it is known that Ambien is a prescription-based drug and hence should be used only after getting hold of a doctor’s prescription. Use Ambien as per the instructions of the doctor to cure your sleep problems and bear in mind that this medicine is likely to become ineffective if used for a long term and hence the use of this drug should be strictly supervised by a physician.


WTF dude!?! Does it SOUND like I have ever used drugs responsibly? I self medicate and rely on a combination of Liz's hubby, my mother and my new pharmacist on blogger. Methinks that is NOT gonna happen.

Just wait until he finds my post where I demand to know how I can get my hands on some Adderall.

26 comments:

Beth said...

BTW, to get some Adderall, you just need to re-enroll in high school and scope out who is selling their pills. Easy!

As for responsibility with pharmaceuticals, well, that just isn't very exciting now is it?

Beth said...

Why is it taking you this long to ridicule this guy? Maybe you really DO need that Adderall.

darsden said...

He sounds like a wanna be doc to me...dr. dick head..LOL esp if he didn't leave a reply button he has to hide..he sounds like he also has something wedged really in the wrong place too. LOL

Girl we know who you be and all about your stanky eye problem and fungus's LOL but you in the big house and it's hard to get good medical attention in there..people are just allergic to orange!

Elle said...

WHAT? Ambiem stops working if used long term?? WTF am I going to do now??

otin said...

Maybe Michael Jackson's Doctor was feeling guilty and trying to make amends by helping people understand the effects of sleep medicine! ha!

Suzy said...

I've been taking 2 Unisom a night for 20 years+ and it stillllll works

rxBambi said...

Ambien for 7-10 days. Ha! As if people only needed it then. Granted I have an rx that I keep around when I need it, but most people are on it for a while. at least longer than a week!
thanks for the linky.. I feel all warm and special inside...

dizzblnd said...

PLUS (as another added bonus, science), I would also probably stop harassing you guys (and Liz' hubby Dan whom I kinda don't believe is a real doctor anymore because he refuses to diagnose my made up Africa diseases via Skype) as to the status of the "fat pill" that you claim to be working on so diligently - which I also no longer believe you're even trying, because you've managed to find a cure for breast and skin cancer but not this? Fat cells aren't even mutating into shit, they're just expanding (exponentially if you're me).

Did you even breathe?? LOL

What an Idgit. One of those "oh no someone is having fun with some help of prescribed medication" prudes Good for you for calling him out!

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Some people need to understand the tone and gist of the blog they are reading.

If you get hold of some Adderall, send some my son's way please.

Captain Dumbass said...

How about a drug that neutralized cholesterol?

CheapAndEasy said...

I've been trying to figure out how to get some Adderall as well. My brother has a prescription - you think he'll notice if I abscond with it? Probably not as he also has a prescription for medical marijuana! Nice little clinic in Venice Beach takes care of that for him. Maybe they can get me the Adderall....

lisa said...

So on the 11th day, are you wide awake again? What does the pseudo doctor prescribe for that?

Smart Mouth Broad said...

I just "love" it when someone comments so seriously when clearly I was being sarcastic, playful and wishful thinking. I believe Mrs. K would call him a fidiot.

Jason, as himself said...

He's out to save, and humiliate, the world.

bearer of three said...

he sounds like one of those people who think they know things but really dont..he probably copied it off the Ambien site and paste it onto your blog lol

Comedy Goddess said...

I just had to share this dumb comment I got from someone:
小貓咪 said...

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August 8, 2009 4:51 AM
Delete

Maybe that makes you feel better?

Amanda said...

HA. I'm writing this comment while on ambien.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

tera said...

Wha...? Obiously Dr Dumbass doesn't realize that people don't blog to get "real" advice. He didn't even try to be witty, or even sarcastic.
Sheesh.
Like anyone's going to ever read his comments again...

I don't even know what to say about Comedy Goddess's comment thingy, except that I immediately noticed the word "SEX" jumps right out at you!

Pastor Sharon said...

Poor guy! He has stopped in to harass the wrong group here! If there isn't a funny bone or sense of humor inside him, he'll crash and burn with us, I am so sure!

mo.stoneskin said...

The irony is that comments like that may cause you to turn to drugs...

Gaston Studio said...

Chaps me big time to have someone make a comment of that nature who has clearly not read the blog; doesn't have a clue as to what the blog is about; and is just plain wrong.

Medora said...

I need Adderall . . . oh, what? Oh, yeah, the retarded comment. Just wait until someone hassles you for using the word "retarded." One of my favorite words, but so not politically correct. My son tells me that it's okay for me to use it, since he is autistic, and developmentally disabled (which is the pc equivalent of "retarded").

Hit 40 said...

Comedy goddess and I both got that comment. I got it 5 times on different past posts. I had to go back to retrieve them. It's some kind of sex site. So now... I should be looking forward to drug advertisement spam?? I deleted all of them just to be anal.

Hit 40 said...

... the ass made the top commenter spot until I deleted them all!! I imagine that he will be back.

Fun to have you blogging again. Missed you :-)

blognut said...

I want adderall! And ambien! And anything else you can get for me.

I promise to use it as irresponsibly as you do, ok?

Ambien Girl said...

I'm with all of you guys...what an idiot!!! I'm all about the drugs...I take Concerta (for ADD) in the morning along with 2 Wellbutrin (great for losing weight). At night I take an Ambien and a Lexapro. I hit the jackpot a month ago when my doctor screwed up and prescribed me 90 freekin' Ambien's a month!!! I thought I had died and gone to heaven. I've been taking Ambien for about 5 years and no, it doesn't lookse it's effectiveness....I get as high today as I did 5 years ago. I actually just started "Ambien Blogging..." the best part is waking up the next morning to see what I wrote the night before.
~Ambien Girl
http://ambiennights.blogspot.com/