Saturday, October 3, 2009

You'd Think They'd At Least Get a DJ...

My God! I truly hate, HATE, HATE National Day Events!!  Right now, they're in in full swing here in Khartoum.  Every other night I'm at some other location walking around a reception making small talk with people I never really want to talk to....it's nothing but men in dresses and juice, as far as the eye can see. 

PLUS, those men in their dresses?  They never want to talk to me - all giving me the stink-eye because, I can only assume, they think I have cooties.  OR, more likely because they know I simply cannot resist asking about their dresses and then end up pointing out that their dress is not really flattering and that they kinda look like they just showed up in their jammies for this event.  Not that I blame them, mind you.  They might be onto something here.  In fact, to save time, I may wear my jammies to the South Korean National Day tonight.  I bet I could gets me an extra 30 minutes of valuable sleep time!

Maybe I shouldn't mock it until I try it!?!?!

However, as my next public service to foreigners who wear the jammies - or Jalabiyah's as is your formal name for it - I feel like I must point out to you that, when you stand outside in direct sunlight, your lightweight, shapless dress is SEE THROUGH! 

WTF MAN!?!?!

I do NOT want to see that shit while I'm driving to work. I'm just sayin', you really should think about wearing a slip with that shit!   I think you can find some pretty reasonable prices for slips at jcpenny.com   Think about it.

Also, in keeping with my public service message theme this am, I feel like I should point out that NOBODY LIKES THAT JUICE!  It's warm, it's thick, and it's sickly sweet.  Also, grown men and women do not drink orange soda.

That's all I have for today.  Once again, you are very welcome!!!!

17 comments:

Beth said...

One should never underestimate the importance of a slip.

Captain Dumbass said...

Do they have winter versions? It's getting colder here now but I'm totally into the relaxed feel of a man-dress.

Pastor Sharon said...

How is it that men can get away with a dress that needs a slip in direct sunlight without being "slutty"?

I mean really? You tell em darlin.

Kelly's Ideas said...

I am now having visuals of things swinging low... thanks! Really appreciate it.. yep I do...

Love,
Kelly

blognut said...

But I thought Oprah said people didn't need to wear slips anymore? I think it was right after she said we didn't need pantyhose anymore, too.

Be a dear and look that up and get back to me, Michel?

Heh. Are those men in see-through jammies at least well hung? Not that I mean to objectify men or anything, I'm just taking a survey.

Lisa (aka LadyWanderlust) said...

So here's a question for you. Men can wear dresses? See through slutty dresses that show dangly parts without slips? And you have to wear pantyhose in the middle of the freaking desert in the year 2009? There is no justice and I think you should really think about contacting Red Cross or Amnesty International to share your story of the mistreatment of American women in foreign countries. I am just saying...

;-) LisaB.

CarrieAnn said...

Ew. Men should wear slips if they're going to wear a dress.

And I really love orange soda. Really.

otin said...

Wearing a dress if you are a guy makes it really easy to pee!

Optimistic Pessimist said...

i was just going to judge, but then realized i wore a shirt on friday that was see through in certain lighting. Where were you with your public service announcement? I could have used you 'cause no one thought it necessary to bring the matter to my attention.

TechnoBabe said...

I wonder of that is a niche for someone to start a business making and selling light weight cotton slips for the guys there? It only takes a few to get the ball rolling so to speak.

tera said...

...um. I drink orange soda...

tera said...

...of course, I don't know if I ever really consider myself an "adult", so to speak...

Suzy said...

I bought 2 jalabiyahs when I was in Morocco. One white and one red. I left the red one in some hotel but still have the white one. They are so comfortable.

You don't own any? Mine has this inner belt that ties so you don't look like a cow. But I can still eat like one!

King of New York Hacks said...

Guys in dresses are a 1/4 of my customers on a Friday night. lol

Fragrant Liar said...

Wait, the men are in dresses AND juice? Holy shit, do they wash their feet in that stuff? Do their hems get wet? Are there hems in Khartoum?

I know, while standing in juice, have the men stick their fingies in light sockets; that'll give you a real visual as you drive by peeping at their understuff. Heh, heh. Then you won't mind getting the stink eye.

McGillicutty said...

I absolutely need to know if you can see their dingle dangles.. i can't imagine if they wear dresses that they would wear Y fronts (BRIT speak for tighty whities).
Respect to you my dear for going through this hell so we can call this world civilized!!!!

Amy said...

I'm with Kelly on the visual. . Not sure I needed that visual!!!

And, I also drink orange soda, but I don't like to think of myself as an adult most of the time. So maybe drinking orange soda is ok?