Saturday, March 6, 2010

I'm Not Sure I've Mentioned this Yet....

But it is 'effin HOT here.  HOT I tell you...and, as everyone keeps reminding me, we're just getting started with the heat, by the end of the month, it's back to my self-titled "scientific experiment month" -- the month where I put shit outside on a rock and see if it will cook and/or melt really cool-like. 

People need to know this....

Anyway, since it's hot, we've decided to take yet another R&R (I know, right?! it totally seems like I am never working -- yaay me! -- however, I realized I forgot to use one of my authorized vacations they give me per year and I totally ain't giving that shit up!) so....in order to escape the heat and the dirt, we've decided to take a vacation to....Abu Dhabi?! 

We're leaving one  hot, dirty, sandstorm-riddled area in Africa and are headed to a hot, dirty sandstorm riddled area in the gulf.   Why?? for the love of all that's holy WHY? YOU ASK!? (as did I?)  Because (a) Stupid Sudan is having national elections soon and I am supposed to be here so I can pretend to care deeply about the "issues" facing Sudan so I can't be gone long; and (b) Josh is participating in a triathlon in Abu Dhabi.  -- Which is apparently why he insisted on hoggin the mail fairy so his "gear" could arrive and he could be prepared for his race and not die.  I'm guessing I probably shouldn't have eaten his power bars...but seriously, who could have known! 

There should have been a sign.

And finally (since I really don't have anything to say) I would just like to point out that we watched a movie this weekend (which I also realize you guys probably all saw like 6 months ago, but just be polite and pretend to listen) "The Road"  with that one guy who was in Hidalgo and used to be soo dreamy until I found out that he likes to write poetry and commune with Nature (that's not my way).    Did you guys see this?? The world is basically dying (I'm still not sure why, or what happened frankly) and that guy in Hidalgo and his son try to go south and avoid cannibals (why are cannibals always depicted like they're from West Virginia?  And why do people from West Virginia always manage to LIVE when everyone else dies off...the inbred people seem to thrive in a catastrophe.....someone should really study that or something.  Learn their secret.)

ANYWAY, I'm not sure what happened, or why I watched that movie.  All I know is that I am going to hoard some shoes (?? No, I'm not sure what happened to everyone's shoes frankly) and some canned fruit cocktail.  Don't ask questions.....trust me.  Just do it. 

You never know when something will happen that will make all the animals die and the people from West Virginia eat you.   It's good to plan ahead.

21 comments:

Carrieann said...

Josh is so selfish...I can't believe he was planning to hoard all of those power bars for himself. You should try to cook some for him on a rock.

Jason, as himself said...

I have no idea what this post is even about. People from West Virginia eating me?

I'll blame in on the wine....

IB said...

My friend Braja suggested I visit your blog because (she said) you are funny.

It seems she is right again (I kinda hate that about her).

Megan said...

i started out feeling excited that you were going on vacay, to feeling scared...like I should check under my bed for cannibals.

blognut said...

ANOTHER VACATION? When do you work, Michel? When?

Oh. Never mind. I forgot who I was talking to - you don't work, do you? And all that pretending to work is exhausting, isn't it? You go on and have your well-earned fun, you can get caught up pretending to work when you return. :)

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gge said...

Sorry, we West Virginians don't eat people. You must be thinking of our neighbors, the Kentuckians.

gge said...

Oh, the inbred part, too. Well, don't think so on that either. I love the stereotype though. Keeps people out of our state so we can enjoy all this Almost Heaven ourselves.

Suzanne said...

"...and used to be soo dreamy until I found out that he likes to write poetry and commune with Nature (that's not my way)."

Loves it, for so many reasons. =)

Diva's Thoughts said...

R & R.....again? damn I'm jealous.

tera said...

I'm all for hoarding shoes. Fruit cocktail? Not sure about that.
Haven't seen the movie but I read the book last year. Hubs hates sad stuff so we probably won't see the movie. And I'm ok with that!

However, the main reason I am writing to you today is to ask, nay beg! you to please take pictures of cool melted/cooked stuff on rocks! That totally sounds like fun! :)

Have fun on your vacay. Supposedly there is good shopping somewhere in A.D. Although...it could be more expensive than it is here (due to wealthy tourist types) so watch your credit cards, missy!

♥ Braja said...

It's true. The inbreds will get you. Better you stay over there for a while cos now that you've written that, you could be in danger in the US.

Oh wait....they can't read it anyway.

All clear.

Anonymous said...

I want to work for the US Government! I wanta take a vaccation all the time! Oh wait I could take a vaccation if I wanted too, I just have no money to pay for it. And I might not have a job when I got back. (if I leave I know I won't wanna return!)
As for eating people, I would be worried for josh, He should sleep with one eye open... I've seen you crazed for food (he has lean muscle) good eat'n

Anonymous said...

I want to work for the US Government! I wanta take a vaccation all the time! Oh wait I could take a vaccation if I wanted too, I just have no money to pay for it. And I might not have a job when I got back. (if I leave I know I won't wanna return!)
As for eating people, I would be worried for josh, He should sleep with one eye open... I've seen you crazed for food (he has lean muscle) good eat'n

Anonymous said...

Oh, what ever you don't ever try to take food off Michel's plate.
I once tried to eat a little pig off her plate and she stabbed me in the face with her fork. Never.... Never.... take food from Michel!!!! I know I was lucky I lived to tell, what if it has been her Little Debbie's! I'd be dead!!!

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Fragrant Liar said...

Good god, woman, while you've been gone, your blog is being comandeered by the band, Anon and the Holy Smoters.

I just don't know if I can continue to be myself here.

But I hope you're having a great time in Abba Dabba Doo!

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

As I believe John Denver sang, West Virginians are zombies. Don't trust them. They have no souls, or something like that.

And I have the book, "The Road", but I haven't read it yet, so I guess I'm not much help. And the movie (I haven't seen it yet either) is probably waaay different than the book anyway.

Lisa said...

Great blog and well written :-)

Lisa

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